It's 3am and the sound of the baby monitor is piercing my sleep. Soft cries are waking me as I slowly open my eyes. I pull my head up and place my feet to the floor. Quietly, I walk to his room where he is waiting for me. I lift him and we make our way down to the kitchen. He and I pace the floor as we wait for his formula to warm. Finally, we sit and he snuggles in as he slurps his midnight snack. I smell his sweet breath and feel his smooth skin. He speaks in gurgles and grunts as he happily drinks. I switch on the television (something the books tell me not to do) and watch a silly show on Food Network. As he finishes, he smiles at me and gently reaches out and grabs hold of my finger and falls asleep. I want time to stand still.